I Am Bread Review - Fear and Loafing in your Kitchen
Have you ever wondered what it's like to be a tasty, crispy piece of freshly baked bread? What little joys and sorrows you'd have if you were it? Would your life be more challenging, adventurous and reckless?
If the answer is "yes" (and I hope it is), then I Am Bread is the right game to quench your curiosity.
Graphics – 4.5/5
To be honest, there's not much to be expected from a game dedicated to the adventures of an audacious piece of bread. Cartoon-stylized visuals capture the silly and mischievous atmosphere of the game. Its graphics are average at best, however, it'd be foolish to expect something cinematic form that title.
The physics though... It's the central idea and the knack of the game. You'll be amazed by the acrobatic stunts that a humble piece of the loaf can perform. And as usual, the gravity will be your 1 foe/ally throughout the game.
Gameplay – 5/5
Obviously, everything can be a video-game today. Even a saga about a courageous piece of bread. Your mission in the game is to aid a suicide-driven and the apparently sapient slice of bread that is striving to be turned into a crispy supplement of a healthy breakfast.
BUT... There are numerous ways to do it. And that's where the fun begins. To make a toast out of yourself you can:
- Reach the toaster;
- Get to the hair-dryer;
- Lie yourself down on a radiator cozily;
- Smash a TV-set in the living room and toast yourself on the flames.
And so on, and so forth.
The crispy suicide quest gets pretty complicated by the way. You have a peculiar substitute for the standard health points called "edibility." As soon as it depletes you'll lose the chance to get toasted and the game will be tragically over. To avoid that misfortune you should try not to fall on the dirty sticky floor and get no foreign substances on you. To do that you should either:
a) Travel from one object to another in a Spiderman's fashion.
b) Use means of transportation (a skateboard).
Moreover, you get a number of modes to enjoy:
- Story mode - simply accomplish mission one by one to learn of the bread's daily hardships.
- Rampage - you get to play as a very solid French baguette, which has a quench for smashing everything around in the house.
- Cheese hunt - you control a maniacal crispy cracker that hunts for cheese.
- Bagel Race - a noble sport of rolling a bagel. Limited time, many obstacles.
- Zero-G - floating in the air, avoiding various objects, getting toasted.
- Free-roam - has no dangers or health limits, therefore, it's good for learning new tricks and experimenting.
Another challenging element of the gameplay is the "grip-meter." As soon as it runs out your potential toast loses the stamina and noses down to its mournful fate.
Controls – 4/5
The controls are based mostly on mashing & smashing the shoulder-buttons of the gamepad.
I promise you: you'll be infuriated, frustrated and devastated for the first 30 minutes of trying to manipulate the damn bread. However, practice makes perfect and by the time you finish the campaign mode, you'll become a real virtuoso.
Replay Value – 4/5
It depends on what mode you personally enjoy. The Story mode, Rampage, and Cheese Hunt are pretty addictive. Zero-G is a nice meditative experience. As for the other modes, well... they become monotonous pretty quickly.
The Bottom Line
I Am Bread is a mirthful and hilarious way to have a good time. It requires you to show some focus while mastering the controls and interacting with the physics but once it's done it turns into refreshing fun. A great way to relax a weary mind.
- Unconventional gameplay
- Realistic physics.
- Solid sound effects.
- A variety of modes.
- No NPCs.
- No multiplayer.
- Average graphics.
- 6 hours of gameplay.
- Tough controls.
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